Hey gal. Now I don't wanna hear no damn fussin about the money. Christmas is a'coming and you use this bit of cash to make it a merry one for you and yours. It's the least I can do. Tell them critters that their Aunt loves them and misses them. And tell that man o yours the same. You darn sure landed a prize fish in him sis. I hate to admit it, and will deny it to hell and back if you ever tell him, but I am a little bit jealous. Funny, here I am, been with just about every kind a man the good Lord put on this Earth, and ain't never found the right one. You find him right out of the gate!
Ignore my bitchin gal, just in a strange mood tonight it seems. I see alot here in my joint, as you can imagine, some good, some bad. But sometimes I see somethin that is just plain sad. Sad enough to break your heart if'n you let it. I seen alot of men come through my doors. Most of them are just men. A little stupid, hard headed, proud, easy to predict, and easier to control. Ha! And I know how to deal with them. Lord knows I do, else I could have never got to where I am. But some of them are different. Some of them are just.... bad. Rotten strait through. I have seen my share of 'em. Best to just get them in and out quietly and quickly before anything flares up. Some men have somethin else inside of them, a hardness, a kind of moral code. These fellas try to do the right thing most times, but can be just as dangerous as the bad ones. They got no give to them. They might not push first, but they are damn quick to push back, and push hard. More like than not, these fellas end up dead in towns like this. Unless they are real good with their iron. And then someone else ends up dead.
And then there are fella's that seem to be good men, but they are just weak. They get worn down by life out here. They fall pray to the pressures that can be put on a man in wild places. Christ knows I've seen it afore. Sometimes these boys try to be men before they are ready, and just get eaten alive. There was one of these kinda fellas in my place tonight. He came here, hell I don't know, year and a half ago, with a pretty little wife and a baby on the way. Came in here lookin for work. I could tell right off he was a little soft for a town like this. Knew I had nothin for him in the way of work, but I kinda took to him a little. I know, you don't even have to say it Margo, I been tendin to strays my whole life. Ain't nothin ever good come of it, I know. But we are who we are girl.
Anyways, this boy's name was Johnny. Cute boy, had a little of a puppy dog look to him. I gave him some beer and listened to his story for a bit. Him and his wife came here from Wichita lookin to start a new life for their family. He was gonna take this town by storm. Same story I have heard from so many of these fellas. This one though just kinda got to me I guess. He had an earnestness to him. I met his wife one day as well. Thought right off there was something funny about her. In my line sis you got to learn to read people right quick, else you got major problems. Well I read this gal well enough. She seemed to be one of those uptight, snooty women that look down on people like me and my gals. At least that's what she wanted people to believe. But she wasn't used to lyin I could tell. I know saloon gals when I see them. And I would be willin to bet my last dollar this girl was no stranger to this life. Her husband might believe she was a pure angel sent strait from the heavens above, but I knew better. But ain't my place to call someone else out on secrets that they might wanna keep hidden. This gal soon became the new school teacher here in town, and I'd see her now and again here and there. Seemed nice enough, but I could tell she didn't really want to get to know me that well. Haha. Can't say that I blame her!
Well over time this fella kinda fell on hard times here. He worked for a spell up at the Mitchellson's ranch, and I think he was a miner for a bit. But nothin seemed to work out. I tried to help him, cause, like I says, I kinda liked the boy. But like it seems to do, life out here changed him over time. I could see it come over him. He began to drink more and more. He started hanging out with some bad men and pickin up their ways. The nice boy I knew is just about gone. Just tonight he was in here and got in a fight with some cowboys. I think these fellas were once friends of his too. I tried to calm things down, and I got Gus to get him out before things went to total hell and lead started flyin. But I can tell Margo, this boy is pretty far down the path. I feel so sad for him. And even his wife. I tried to talk to her the other day, but she just kinda ignored me. I could see the pain in her face though. Breaks my heart girl. Cause, as you know, I sure have been there.
I know what you are thinkin. I got my own problems to worry about and my own life to lead and I should stop interfering in everyone elses! Lord, I can hear you and Mama saying that in my head to this day! And I know you are right. I just can't help it. I fear things for this boy and gal are gonna end bad. And it makes me plum sad.
Merry Christmas girl. You know I love you. Always
Ruby
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